Loss is inevitable. Whether it’s a death or a break-up, loss comes with grief. Grief is a deep sorrow, synonymous to heartache, heartbreak, sadness, anguish, and despair. There are different stages of grief but every stage is experienced differently for every individual. If you’re grieving right now, regardless of what stage you’re in, here are some reminders to help you.

Everyone deals with grief different:

Your grief may not look like someone else’s grief. Some people may sleep a lot more than usual, while others cry. Some people get more physically active, while others choose more creative outlets. Just because you are grieving differently, doesn’t mean you’re not grieving, you’re not in pain, or you’re not hurting.

Grief comes in waves:

There will be days when you think you’re making progress in moving forward, and then you’re suddenly hit by a huge wave of grief and you feel like you’re right back at square one. It’s normal to feel waves of grief—this is not a sign that you’re weak or you can’t move forward. Sometimes we’re triggered by a certain memory or moment we’ve experienced with our loved one and that leads us back to grief—and that’s okay.

Accept help:

If people are sincere about wanting to help you, let them. It’s okay to accept help from others. If people offer to help and you’re not quite ready, don’t be afraid to reach back out to them when you are ready. Helping you doesn’t have to be something huge—it can be as simple as listening to you or sitting with you.

Give yourself grace, give yourself permission to just be:

If you need to spend time alone or time to cry, give yourself permission, time, and space to do so. If you’re taking longer than someone else to grieve, allow yourself to do so. Don’t be so hard on yourself.

You may never move on, but you will move forward:

The memories of that person will be there—always. You will never forget. But you will move forward, eventually. That person was a part of your life at one point, and that means you will never forget. Moving forward doesn’t mean you’ll stop hurting or stop remembering. It simple means you accept what was and you accept what is.

I hope these words help you today if you’re grieving. Grief isn’t only experienced when we lose someone we love to death. It’s experienced when we lose anyone or anything we love whether through breakup, separation, or death. Don’t let someone else minimize your pain. Take the time you need to grieve, because only then can you start to heal.

Wishing you the best.

~ Sincerely, mainou

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Let's Talk About Grief | If You’re Grieving, This is For You